Meaningful Connections in a Tech-Focused World
Recently, I had the pleasure of attending a live talk given by famous psychotherapist, Esther Perel. If you aren’t familiar with her work, I highly encourage you to check her out.
In her talk, Esther covered all sorts of topics related to love, sex, and relationships. She reinforced and expanded on ideas that frequently arise in my own professional conversations. One is the tendency we have these days to engage in a virtual world of screens all day, only to come home and participate in more screen time, often while our significant other or family members are doing the same thing right beside us. Esther noted how lonely this can feel, and in a time when many of us are experiencing more loneliness than ever. Don’t we want to be aware of and invested in opportunities for more connection?
What Makes Life Worth Living?
Esther was asked big questions about happiness, love, and meaning. Several of the questions boiled down to a discussion of what makes life worth living? I have to say, I wholeheartedly agreed with her response, which was - our connections to others.
Now, she didn’t say financial wealth, career achievements, or maintaining a certain body type. She said, it is our human to human experiences, and the quality of those connections, that matter and create meaninging in our lives.
Balancing Technology with Genuine Presence
As humans, we are social creatures. We evolved to be in groups with other humans and more and more we seem to be losing that sense of connection to the technology around us. Don’t get me wrong - I use and enjoy technology much of the time but I do think it is a double edged sword. That is why I practice, and try to encourage others to practice, setting boundaries with phones, social media, TV, and other types of pervasive technologies these days.
Personally, one way I strive to foster meaningful connections in my life is by prioritizing being present when I’m with others. That means that usually when I am visiting with friends or family, I put my phone aside and give my full attention to the people around me. Sometimes, that means I miss an incoming message and don’t get to respond to it until much later. I’ve decided I am okay with missing a message from time to time because I’m honoring something that is of importance to me. I will often peek at my phone at regular intervals to ensure there is nothing urgent (there almost never is) and wait to respond to anything that has come in until I have the time to give a thoughtful response.
If you’re seeking ways to explore and deepen your relationships, learning more about individual relationship therapy may help you build stronger connections while setting healthy boundaries with technology.
How Do You Cultivate Meaningful Connections?
Sometimes, technology may help to foster connections in our lives. In an age of social media, instant messaging, video calls, and a whole host of other resources for virtual meetups - we are able to be more connected than ever. You can send a message at any time to let someone know you’re thinking of them. You can snap a photo of a place or an item that reminds you of someone and send it their way. You can have shared experiences, like watching movies together, from across the country.
I think at the end of the day, it is important to just be thoughtful about how you are connecting to others and consider if you feel closer to the person or not after spending time with them, in whatever way you are choosing to do that.
When to Seek Support for Deeper Connections
If you are struggling identifying what is of importance to you or fostering meaningful relationships in your life, it can be helpful to have support in reflecting and practicing. If you are ready for that support, let me know, I’d love to hear from you.
Summary / TL;DR
In a world saturated with screens, meaningful connections are essential for fulfillment. While technology offers ways to connect, prioritizing genuine, in-person interactions remains vital. Reflect on your own connections and consider reaching out if you need guidance in building closer relationships or managing digital boundaries.
