Embracing “Good Enough” on “Not Enough” Days
Sometimes we need a reminder to slow down and go easy on ourselves. It is okay to not be at your best. It is okay to not give something your all. It is okay to not be okay.
DISCLAIMER: I am a licensed clinical psychologist, and the information provided here is for general informational and educational purposes only. While I aim to share helpful and thoughtful content, reading this blog does not establish or imply a therapist-client relationship between us.
If you are experiencing a mental health crisis, please seek immediate help from a licensed professional or contact emergency services in your area. This blog should not be a substitute for professional mental health care or personalized guidance.
For personalized support or therapy services, please reach out directly to a licensed mental health provider in your area.
A Conversation with a Friend
I got a good reminder of this while chatting with a friend recently. We were texting about meeting up later in the day and joking about our various struggles—like fatigue, an overwhelming week, and mustering up the energy to be “functional adults” for the day.
At one point, my friend joked that she might not be feeling particularly functional or adult-like, but that she was “conscious and clean.” That struck me as such a wonderful affirmation for the day.
Today, I am conscious and clean.
Meaning: I am awake, alert, alive, and have made some sort of effort toward hygiene.
Some days, that is a good enough goal. Some days, that will be your best effort—conscious and clean. And that is completely okay.
Why We Feel Pressure to Always Be "On"
We often hold ourselves to impossibly high standards, particularly those of us prone to anxiety and perfectionism. We expect ourselves to be productive, to check off every item on our to-do list, to push through exhaustion, and to function at peak capacity no matter the circumstances. But the truth is, we are not machines. We have limits, and sometimes, the most compassionate thing we can do for ourselves is to acknowledge them.
Society often reinforces the idea that our worth is tied to our productivity. We celebrate hustle culture, glorify busyness, and sometimes even feel guilty for resting. But constantly pushing ourselves beyond our limits leads to burnout, stress, and exhaustion. It can also make it difficult to enjoy the present moment because we are so focused on what we should be doing instead.
The Power of Small Wins and Self-Compassion
What if, instead of striving for perfection, we learned to celebrate the small wins? What if we gave ourselves permission to have days where simply being "conscious and clean" was enough? These small moments of self-compassion can help shift our mindset from constant self-criticism to self-acceptance.
For example, maybe today you didn’t tackle everything on your list, but you did get out of bed and make yourself a cup of coffee. That’s still something. Maybe you didn’t have the energy to respond to every email, but you took a break when you needed it. That matters, too. Recognizing these little victories can help reframe how we view success.
Practical Strategies for Self-Compassion
If you struggle with anxiety and perfectionism, here are a few ways to practice self-compassion and embrace "good enough" days:
Set realistic expectations. Instead of aiming for perfection, aim for progress. Break tasks into smaller, manageable steps.
Use affirmations. Phrases like “I am enough as I am” or “I am doing my best, and that is okay” can be powerful reminders.
Prioritize rest. Rest is not a reward for productivity; it is a necessity for well-being. Allow yourself to slow down without guilt.
Check in with yourself. Ask yourself, “What do I need right now?” Sometimes, the answer might be a nap, a deep breath, or just a moment of stillness.
Practice mindfulness. Bringing awareness to the present moment can help reduce the pressure to always be “on.”
Why Connection Matters More Than Productivity
That day with my friend was a perfect example of how we don’t have to be at our best to experience connection and joy. Neither of us felt particularly energized, but we had a great day together nonetheless. We even ended up getting some errands done! More importantly, we laughed, we commiserated, and we enjoyed each other’s company. Not once did I judge her for whatever she was bringing to the table that day, nor did I feel judged by her. It was a day of moving at our own pace and playing by our own rules.
This experience reminded me of something essential: we are loved and valued not for what we accomplish, but for who we are. The people who truly matter in our lives don’t expect us to be perfect. They simply want us to show up as we are.
Giving Yourself Permission to Slow Down
The next time you feel pressured to do more, to push yourself beyond your limits, I encourage you to check in with yourself. Ask: What would actually be helpful? What do I truly need today? Maybe the answer isn’t a completed checklist or a perfectly executed plan. Maybe it’s simply being conscious and clean. And maybe, just maybe, that is more than enough.
When to Seek Support for Anxiety and Perfectionism
If you find yourself struggling with anxiety, perfectionism, or the pressure to always be "on," you don’t have to navigate it alone. Reach out to me for professional support, and together we can find strategies that help you create more balance and self-compassion in your life.
Summary / TL;DR
Perfectionism and the pressure to always be "on" can leave you feeling exhausted, anxious, and overwhelmed. But the truth is, you don’t have to be at your best every single day. Some days, just being "conscious and clean" is enough.
Embracing imperfection, celebrating small wins, and prioritizing self-compassion can help shift your mindset away from constant self-criticism. Whether it's setting realistic expectations, taking mindful breaks, or leaning into connection, finding balance is key.
If perfectionism and anxiety are making life feel overwhelming, working with a skilled and experienced therapist can help you build self-compassion and release the pressure of always performing.
Need support to embrace balance?
